Peeru Fanfic Comments

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Zeracles
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Zeracles » Sat Oct 01, 2011 2:33 pm

Interesting irony bit in that chapter, on a related note I'm getting the impression cultural differences between humanity and Druuge are entrained (and then inertial) rather than innate. Much like differences between say, Brits and Americans.
Twinkle twinkle Paul and Fred (more)

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Death 999
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Death 999 » Sat Oct 01, 2011 6:12 pm

I don't think it'll be too spoilery to say that it's not just cultural. Even the 'old ways' were still private enterprise / self-interest dominated. It was just less corporate, less homogenized. Contracts including specific personal relationships are the oldest form of writing. And that's how they like it.

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Angelfish
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Angelfish » Fri Oct 14, 2011 7:16 am

just started reading this again. It's incredible how fleshed out the main character is. You really gave this some thought.
Did she really reject a potential crewmate for being lesbian?
Rydra tented her fingers in front of her face. "Commander. Your system of allocating crew is distateful."
forgot an 's' there?

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Death 999
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Death 999 » Fri Oct 14, 2011 11:35 am

If you're talking about the syreen couple on the starbase, Peeru rejected her because she was extremely disrespectful and didn't seem interested. If Nuun… well, maybe the sexual assault had something to do with it.

I'll go and fix that line.

… and a few others. 'sunlight engines' indeed.

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Death 999
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Death 999 » Tue Nov 01, 2011 9:03 pm

We're up to chapter 41, and I've updated the character reference guide.

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Draxas
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Draxas » Wed Nov 02, 2011 4:31 am

You misspelled Zelnick's name near the end (the line about the Eluders). Otherwise, nice chapter, though the comms sequence with the Mycon was a mite confusing.

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Death 999
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Death 999 » Wed Nov 02, 2011 1:48 pm

I fixed the spelling, and wonder if my change on the Mycon conversation is an improvement.

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Death 999
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Death 999 » Wed Nov 30, 2011 8:31 pm

Due in part to my participation in p6014, I took off the mid-month, but I'm back.

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Draxas
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Draxas » Thu Dec 01, 2011 3:16 pm

I assume what that bit at the end was all about will be clarified in a future chapter, but as for now it didn't make a lick of sense. I lost both characters' trains of thought by the end of the chapter.

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Death 999
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Re: Peeru Fanfic Comments

Post by Death 999 » Thu Dec 01, 2011 10:52 pm

That was not the intent. Where did it stop making sense? I can see the end makes the least, but it got gradually more and more obscure through the chapter.

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